amidthehoopla

Turning over a new leaf

on June 12, 2014

DSC01616

I figured it was finally time to make some big changes in my life since big changes are already happening. Changes are happening so much on the exterior that the interior needs to match or vice versa. I finally got a job and with that came a lot of emotional struggle and questioning of life and my faith. Funny because it is a part time job at a gift card shop. It’s not like I am saving lives or traveling the world but it meant a lot to me to be breaking from the old “tapes” that have been playing through my head over the past 5 years and living the same roles of life over and over and over again. You see, I have been through such an unbelievable journey that even if I wrote all of the wonderful and magical events that have occurred, it wouldn’t be enough to explain how it felt and what it meant to me because it was only meant for me. From a distance you would probably think that nothing has changed because I am still driving the same car, living in the same apartment, I look the same, and have the same routines. To me, I am a whole new person and I am moving forward with my life but I am also moving away from where I have been born and raised. I have to because this life no longer fits me anymore. People can hold you back and make you feel as though you are still the same person.
I had what I like to call “a day” about 3 days ago. This is when no matter what you do you cannot shake the heavy rain cloud hovering above you and in all honesty, you don’t really want to. There seems to be this comfort in feeling sorry for yourself or going backwards in your mind wondering how things could have turned out and thinking about what is reality and what isn’t. I use to go to these places in my mind for days and now its just about an afternoon or an hour or so. Just enough time to revisit what my deep feelings are and try to understand and examine what is wrong and how to fix it. Then I usually cry my ass off and I am good for another month or so. You with me? Well, I decided that it has to be over! I have to be able to let go and just keep moving forward. I need to surround myself with nothing but complete positivity and videos, books, friends, movies, places that support that. I am going to keep a blog of my journey so I can share with you where I have been in the last 5 years and how I am going to continue to get out of it. Because although things may seem peachy, I have been to hell and back and I am just now really embracing the light. I have finally been able to shake those last few limitations and barriers. So, in future blogs I will have the balls to disclose where I am in my life and my journey and path to health wealth and happiness. I am so excited because I started this blog not really knowing where it might lead me and it finally hit me the other day that I needed to be able to express what I have gone through and where I am going. For today, I am going to finish my video by Kate Northrup and do some EFT tapping. How exciting?! If you are going through a tough time or if you are just ready to make some changes in your life, then just keep the faith and you can take this journey with me. I know my life is getting better and this blog will prove it. There is magic everywhere!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: