amidthehoopla

COME VISIT!

Hey dedicated amidthehoopla blog followers, please come visit me on http://www.cleaneatingempath.wordpress.com   I would love to see you there! I have more content and have wonderful recipes that I would love for you to try! Thanks for being there for me through my blogging journey.

 

BJ

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New Blog & My Passion!

For all of my lovely fans and followers, I have started a new blog for my blogging class and for my true passion. It is called Clean Eating Empath. I encourage you to follow that blog. It is similar to this blog but has more food and recipes incorporated in it. I will post on here occasionally and hopefully more now that I am understanding blog better. In the meantime, please check me out at http://www.cleaneatingempath.wordpress.com . Thanks to all of you that have liked and followed my posts!!! I wish you all great writing success and finding your true passion

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Winter Afternoon

I didn’t have to go to work today because it snowed enough, finally, for the schools to be canceled. So, that meant NO WORK!!! YEAH!!! It is so beautiful outside and although the temperatures are going to be below zero tonight and for the next few days, I am enjoying this time with gratitude. I wonder at times when life gets so very busy about what it really means. Funny but sometimes it takes a snowstorm to actually put you back on course. If life is about balance then you need to rest when you have been working so hard to accomplish your goals or even everyday tasks. By “rest” I really mean rest. Get all into it. Not just sit there and try to watch a movie but think about how you could be unpacking boxes from the garage from your move 7 months ago. Resting is resting and you have to give it 100% just as you would to accomplish any goal. This storm has been able to help me see what I really remember deep in my soul. I remember how much I love to write and how I can create any reality I want to live. It is Ok to sit and cry on your day off because maybe you have been holding things in for way too long. When your life is work and after work you work and when you are alone you work on working on yourself…you see where I am going with this. Then, you can tend to bottle up emotions and they may not even be sad emotions. It really took me awhile to understand and accept that crying did not mean I was depressed or something was “wrong” with me. It simply meant that I needed to be able to let go of everything that I see and feel on a daily basis. Sometimes you just don’t have time to cry about the stray dog that you tried to help on the side of the road or the fact that you miss your family CONSTANTLY. Crying because I am so grateful for the life that has already been created for myself or the fact that I have been given the ability to see my life in a whole new light because I control all of my emotions. There are so many beautiful and magical events that unfold as you take the time to slow down and listen…really listen to what your soul wants and needs. This is a very peaceful winter afternoon as the pink sun begins to set, I am grateful for the snow coming just when I needed it the most.

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writer’s block

I can’t believe I have neglected my blog for so long. Through many signs and synchronicities, I have been brought back to my blogging community to be able to share my thoughts about everything and nothing. I actually took a creative writing class after I made my big move back in August. I absolutely loved it and one of the things that every writer in the class discussed was the fact that they never gave themselves time to write. Every single person in that class was a first timer for the creative writing course and every single one was absolutely poetic with their stories. I was really proud of the pieces I worked on in class and maybe I will share them on my blog. We all admitted to the “block” that gets us. Now, I am not talking about the block where you feel stuck and you cannot think of anything to write. We didn’t have issues about not being creative or being incapable of producing new work. No, we had a block that many people encounter often in their life. It doesn’t have to do with writing though. It is a block of joy or creative flow. You see, most people have blocks that they have created as a result of something that happened when they were younger. For instance, I was raised to believe that you work and then you can play. Never play without working! Some of you may have a deep belief that you have to put everyone before yourself so how would ever sit down and give yourself time to be able to write just for the fun of it. Well, not to worry because I also took an EFT(Emotional Freedom Technique) class after I moved. So, I was able to unlock that core belief and understand why I wouldn’t allow myself to sit and do what I love. Which is to write, of course. I just found it interesting that I was not the only person that had this issue. I had an itch to write on my blog tonight and want to continue to do so even if it is about nothing. So, thanks for reading. I hope all of you allow yourself to have joy in doing what you love.

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Saturday Sentiment

Today is bittersweet because it will be the last morning in my home with my girls (my three cats). It has been a long time coming for me to move up and on in my life. I have been happily moving forward through many blocks and possibly creating some hectic situations and maybe even to avoid any sadness that may arise. I have been letting myself feel my emotions and express them easily. I am so ready to move out of here but I also feel a bit of sadness. I see Scooty looking out the bedroom window down into the trees. I pray that all three girls adjust to their new environment. Anybody that has a heart for animals can understand. You put them before you just like you would children. To me, they are my kids! I got up and did yoga this morning with the balcony wide open and I could hear the birds chirping. Around here, nobody is really up and moving until 9ish so the neighbors were all quiet. I will desperately miss hearing the train from afar. It really feels like home when I can hear the faint blow of the train whistle. It reminds me of fall evenings when it was still warm enough to keep the window open at night or of working at the farmer’s market downtown and seeing the train pass by the lot. I have always been sentimental. I can remember writing in my journal every year on the last day of summer break, ” I can’t believe tomorrow I start the 5th grade”, I wrote. So, it’s no surprise to me that most people can move out and not think twice but for me I have had some meditation and journal sessions about it. To me it represents all of the nights I sat on the balcony with the girls and visualized a new home and all of the cold winters with my magazine pictures spread across the living room floor, cutting and pasting for my vision board. All of my dreams are coming true and all of my prayers have been answered. So, I give myself permission to shed a few tears if I have to. This home has blessed me in many ways and in the 5 years that I have been here, I have changed in ways even I couldn’t even dream of. We have had wonderful family Christmas’ here including this last winter where we were snowed in for days. We held a Harry Potter marathon! I am so excited about my new life but yes I will always be grateful for all of the little wonderful details and memories this home has given me. I love watching the animals from my windows and feeding the stray cats(even finding some of them homes), Scooty learning to walk on her leash, Phoebe crying from downstairs and me having to go get here EVERYNIGHT! I have changed into a completely different women within these walls and now I am ready to grow. Our new home is absolutely perfect for us. Tomorrow we make the trek down south to move into our new home where my love is already moved in waiting on us. It is the end of living alone with my girls and just like a single mom with her kids, haha, we are ready to start a new life and a new family. I am so excited to share this on my blog. I have put out the intention to continue to embrace change and accept my transformation. Hell, I even gave a huge load of donations of, basically, crap I was holding onto. Why did I form such an attachment to stinky orange tennis shoes my boyfriend in college gave me? Gross! It’s funny how we hold onto things. It felt good to let it all go. I affirmed to the universe:I am letting go of the old and happily accept all new into my life. What material things are you holding onto? Have you had a major move in your life recently? Please share!

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Ask and you shall receive

I have found over the last few weeks that not only is it good to give but it takes just as much love to receive. I have been praying about a way to be able to move successfully and then I found out about http://www.gofundme.com . So, I took this as a sign to try to ask for assistance. I suppose sometimes in life we start to believe that we aren’t deserving of help or think to ourselves “why would anyone want to help me or give me money?”. Haven’t you ever heard your parents say “You have to work hard to get what you want”? But is this true? It doesn’t have to be. It most definitely doesn’t have to be true for you. I have found that when I was relaxed and passionate in my efforts to achieve a goal or “get” something, that it happened very easily. I am just as deserving as anyone else and so are you. I help people, animals, shelters, etc in anyway that I can, when I can. So, what is wrong with me asking for some help. If you are interested in helping please check out my page below or take the time to post to your Facebook or blog. Better yet? Why don’t you look within to see what it is you may need help with and be open to the universe giving it to you. After all, we all deserve the very best!
http://www.gofundme.com/b0cbtc

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Lists upon lists upon lists

Well, it seems as much as I try to post everyday to share in my progress I kind of get distracted. A lot of wonderful things are happening for me right now. I have continued to do EFT tapping. (Have you looked into it yet?) It does really work but I need to make myself do it. Why is it that the things that work so great for us, are the things we avoid? I guess it is like a good workout. You feel so great afterwards and wonder why you don’t do it all of the time…but do you keep up with it? I can feel some old belief systems falling away as well as limitations I had set on myself for years. I have a strong feeling that in the next few days some really wonderful things are going to happen. I recently started a new affirmation “only good lies before me”. So, I hope it will work as well as my “my income is constantly increasing”. That one has really been working and although I know it has been in small ways, they have really helped me out which proves that it is true, my income IS constantly increasing. I did, however, start to feel negative about my new job. It is hard to work with negative people. So, although I am really positive and love the job, the women there are comical. That’s all I can say really because they just…Well, I really have never seen anything like it except maybe junior high. It’s pretty bad. So, instead of getting bogged down with it I keep trying to remind myself that I am creating my surroundings and that they are just a small piece of a bigger picture. Damn, it’s hard. I’m not even going to lie to you. I was so frustrated with two of them the other day. I don’t even want to go into details because it is so freakin’ silly. Anyway, I kept wanting to get revenge on one of them and I realized she is so negative that I am probably annoying her just by being my happy go lucky self. So, you know I amped that up 100%!!! I suppose today I did get down about it because I started wondering “why do I want to do with my life”. Right now I am making money and when I move I know I will want to work but doing what? I need to be busy and creative so just sitting at an office, although I have done this, just is not for me. I thought about it and I know that I love writing. LOVE IT! Am I good at punctuation and grammar? Maybe not the best but it really feels freeing to be able to write out your thoughts or creative ideas. I am also interested in Feng shui among many other things. I have dabbled in so many fields that I feel I am pretty open to trying different career paths. What is your career? How and when did you know it was for you? How long have you been doing it? I just know that no matter what I am doing as a career, it needs to be where I am expressing myself creatively. IT HAS TO!!! So, today I was getting down thinking if I will ever find something that I love and stick to it. I have to stay positive because I know I am getting closer and I am remembering that whatever I am thinking and feeling is creating my future. So, I am just keeping the faith and trying out different things that I am interested in. Now, if I could only find a career that pays VERY WELL and let’s me be able to play with my cats all day (and watch reality tv). Is that possible? I do know that making lists is a great way to let the universe know what you want. You don’t even have to be specific about it. You can be as specific as you want to be. That’s a great idea for me to do that tonight! Can you tell me the top 5 things you would have on your list that you want? Doesn’t matter if it’s in a soul mate, career, lifestyle, items you want to own, places you want to visit, etc. Please share with me! Come on…I need some inspiration! 

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Out of my mind

This is written so beautifully! I have been there but have never had been able to express it like so. Please check it out!

The Be(a)st In Me

Today I struggle with living. Not the battle of choosing between death and life, but actual living.

So easily I get lost in my head and forget that it’s unhealthy to not poke around in the real world now and again.

That though reality is often hard to face, it’s the truth. It is what it is and I’m in what it is.

I find a comfy corner of my mind and curl up with the intention of a temporary retreat.

What I intend to be a few hours stay in the company of creativity and solace, turns into an eternity of delusion and disconnect.

A place that if not monitored, time will leave me behind and I’m left with the feelings that are good company, but hold me captive.

What feels so good, avoiding the inconvenient, slowly and painlessly sabotages the only time I have to claim as mine.

If I don’t…

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Keep It Up!

I just wanted to check in since I am at home with my computer. I have been housesitting(this includes caring for many many pets), working, getting ready to move, working out, etc. all week so it’s been pretty busy. I know things will slow down after next Monday so I will be able to post longer and more detailed information about the work I have been doing to transform my life. Since I have had everything going on all at once, I found myself almost in panic attacks. It was like I couldn’t get out of it. I couldn’t make time go fast enough so that I could get things done. Yes, you read that right. Most people say they want time to slow down but I am excited for my mom to be back from vacation so I can go on a mini weekend getaway. Also, I have a move coming up in August. So, when I had to work on Sunday from 12 to 5, all I could think of is “God please hurry this day along so I can be a step closer.” Funny how we wish away time so we can get to what is “important” to us. I was so worked up that my usual “treatments” weren’t working to make the anxiety go away. I just keep thinking of more and more things that needed to be done but I wouldn’t be able to actually do them until the end of the week. I finally had a break down yesterday because I knew if I kept it up then I would go right back into having health problems and telling the universe ” Hey, can I please have more stuff to stress about?”. The biggest thing that works for me is exercise. Honestly, I like to do all types of physical activity but when I get whipped into a froth, I simply walk…walk walk walk! It clears my head, it feels great, I get to be in nature (except for now because it’s so damn hot out this week). Then everything magically goes away. No not really but what does happen is the things I needed to do immediately suddenly fall away into that place in my mind that I believe is file “mehh”. You know? Kind of like, well if it happens it happens attitude. So, although I know that I still want to accomplish that long list of chores or activities, I can be more relaxed about it and focus. My God does exercise help me focus! I also make lists of gratitude. Since I had a lot to do last night, I did not make a list but I said aloud the things I was grateful for (which was hard because my moms dogs mangled a baby raccoon at 530 in the morning and I held it until it passed) so it was a rough way to start my day. I did it anyway. I also took a bath with essential oil and epsom salts in complete silence(except for me talking aloud to myself) and topped it off with some EFT tapping. Don’t worry if you don’t understand some of my methods because I will go into detail about them in future posts. I felt great before bed and I just kept saying positive affirmations all night and into the morning. It was nice to be able to calm down and sit outside in the country with 7-10 farm cats and 3 sweet pups. I actually enjoyed my night! What kinds of results did that produce for my day? Well, I woke up feeling great and decided to walk on the treadmill before work. Gas prices went down and I also used my fuel points to get extra money off. When I got to work, I was excited that I got to spend the day with a very sweet employee and we had a lot of fun doing revisions and changing out the displays. Today was one of those days that if I didn’t have a million things to do after work then I would have stayed longer. It literally flew by! See, I am learning to let go and trust God because when I get so worked up about life and force everything to go a certain way then it never works out but when I relax then everything falls into place. Trust me! It has taken many roads for me to get to this points so if reading this sounds obnoxious then I get it. I was most definitely there. I could not stand people being so damn chipper. I am learning along with you. If you don’t know anything about EFT tapping and you would like to learn more before I am able to post about it please check out Nick Ortner and The Tapping Solution. I always turn to Louise Hay as well. Hey! You are awesome! Keep it up!!! For now I am off to feed some more fur babies and give myself some extra TLC tonight for doing so great!

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F_cking Facebook

Facebook is an interesting concept. Don’t ya think? It is so interesting to me that people claim their undying love to their partner on social media. Why not just turn to your loved one and tell them yourself?! I guess it isn’t as meaningful if you don’t have 35 “likes” to back up your claim. Kind of like this post right now. I am bitching about other people. Social media is weird and I don’t care how “trendy” and “modern” it is, it will always be weird to me to see people telling their one year old Happy Birthday when they will never see it, seeing a picture of someone that is potty training their child, a picture of your husband cleaning your house or creating more labels by stating that you are Gay, Straight, in a relationship, etc. I suppose it is because I have never been one to “go with the crowd” or just accept something because everyone else is doing it. I question everything and I guess that is what makes me so damn interesting and unique. I love to sit and ponder about life and life choices. I have recognized peoples children in public because I have seen their pictures all over Facebook. Isn’t that creepy? Anyone? On the other hand, I know Facebook has been able to reconnect people, rescue animals, help businesses succeed and share important news (you know the news that they aren’t really showing on television or in papers). This is my form of self expression today. Can you tell I am working on self expression through writing? What do you think? 

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